In Case You Weren't Aware...

...Filter Magazine really blows.

It used to be my favorite. Not because I was balls-crazy about Coldplay or anything, but because it was so damn well-written, well-researched, and sincere. But now with its increased popularity, Filter's attempted to do the opposite of its name, and in doing so has become the Newsweek of music magazines (stop reading this now if you don't recognize how shitty Newsweek is, please). Everything and anything that could possibly fall into the category of "indie rock" is represented, and because it's such a moronically wide scope, every single damn article is not only the same, but also just as optimistic as the last. That pretty singer-songwriter who isn't doing anything special? She gets 4 pages, 2 of which contain full-page photographs. That new album by an old favorite that really just sort of sucks? It makes the cover (Hey Wilco). Those once-entertaining and intelligent tyrades between writer and fan alike, criticizing with the utmost love? Replaced with either blind enthusiasm (OMG I LOVE YOUR MAG SOOO MUCH I'M SO HAPPY ITS IN VIENNA OR WHEREVER THE FUCK I'M FROM NOW) or semi-criticism (Um, pretty sure that one article was blatant plagiarism, did you guys know that?). And, as just mentioned, the long list of hipster references, some of which are misquoted/wrong anyway. Shall I list them?

1. Tactfully mentioning suicide at least once in an article concerning Elliott Smith (yeah, we get that you know he's dead)

2. Blatantly ripping off the lines from not-that-obscure movie/book (i.e., Fight Club) in an unrelated (and shitty) article about the Swedish music scene (and just paraphrasing too; not even respectful plagiarism)

3. Starting your interview article with something along the lines of "Sitting in back of the (insert name of chic cafe), Charlotte Gainsbourg / Beck / Mick Jagger / Pop artist No-One's-Heard-Of smooths his/her hair and pulls out his/her (insert brand of cigarettes)."

4. Referencing The Velvet Underground at least 70 times per issue, once accompanied by the false remark that John Cain and Lou Reed just picked up Nico for a singer at Warhol's one night because she was hot, whiuch explains her unconventional voice (actually, they paid for her flight from Germany because they liked her album so much).

5. Giving no less than 85% to any album reviewed, ever.

6. Describing someone's sound as "art rock" or referencing The Jam when not completely necessary.



Someone revive my flailing and sputtering faith in music journalism, and fast.