The Necessity of Change

In less than a week, I'll be leaving for the lush green lawns of St. Hugh's College in Oxford, England.

I don't feel ready.
I may just be stressing, but it feels at this point as if I'm feeling the opposite of how I should. My best friend is visiting from Arizona, and we're having a great time. But it's now almost escapism from the constant nagging and reminding and questioning and listing and fact-spewing of my mother. The combination of being always on the go and always having just one more thing to do is driving me up the wall and into the corner. I'm dreading leaving my friends, which I'll only have for such a very short time anyway. I'm dreading the return to required readings and forced comraderie of classmates. I'm already dreading Amy leaving, too.

I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe it's that recently missed opportunity, or that not-yet forgotten death in the family, or that very, very overdue phone call. It could even be lack of sleep.

Whatever it is, I need a release.